A Garage Thanksgiving....

Who knew that a double car garage could bring a family together at Thanksgiving? We arrived at my in-law’s house on Wednesday afternoon greeted with contractors, furniture moved, drop cloths on the floor and much more chaos than one could imagine. On top of that there were five young kids running around among the mess to add to the drama!  My first thought was, “Wow!” The remodeling that was done looked great but the mess left over, not so much. However, my mother –in-law seemed to be calm for the moment. I don’t know how she did it knowing that the next day she was expecting 30 people to dinner. I would’ve been a mess! I am the control type and tend to stress over the details and there were a lot of details  still left to be dealt with!

The next day, Thanksgiving Day, the whole family began to pitch in to make things come together. After much planning and strategy we quickly realized that 30 people would not fit into the dining area, so we made the garage our dining room. We threw a clean beige  tarp on the floor to create a make shift rug , set up some tables and chairs , decorated the table tops with my 6 year old nephews homemade place mats,  set paper plates and plastic silverware and “BAM!” we were set!

Within a few hours the once dusty , cluttered garage turned into a family dining room filled with aunts, uncles, grandparents, mothers, fathers,  sisters, brothers, nieces, nephews, cousins , daughters and sons- a family was joined together! Even after Thanksgiving dinner, we continued to use the garage all weekend for our meals, playing family games, doing crafts and drinking coffee and dessert to end our evenings.  It was an unlikely place that somehow turned into a cozy space!

 I learned that it is not about the beautiful decorations or the elegant tableware that makes for a beautiful Thanksgiving but rather it was about taking life’s situations and making the best out of them by making memories. I was thankful for the reminder that life is never about the details about the people!  My in-laws double car garage will never be looked at the same!

Better is Better than Gold!

"When you cease to be better, you cease to be good." George Knox

How many times are we tempted to think that we have arrived at a place of superiority over people and circumstances in our lives? Probably more often than we would like to admit, huh?  For example, I have been a parent now for 18 years and I have 4 children. I have been through the infant, toddler and teen stage and understand the challenges well. However,  I could become tempted to think that I have nothing else to learn in the matter. How foolish this would be for me to do this? Believe me, my children are my teachers and I have much more to learn!

There is nothing respectable in thinking you are superior to someone. We must be willing to make progress in order for us to overcome our previous self. Are you willing to work towards progress and becoming better at situations and people in your life? Do you self examine your days,weeks  months or even years past to see if you have grown? If so, when was the last time you did this and what did you observe? Have you done anything about what you saw?

I am always telling my children that they must learn to be a teachable. We have to be a student of life constantly. When we fail to stop learning in  areas of our life then we just missed the point altogether about what life is all about. Life is a process of learning and journeying through challenges, growing to be the best person we can be. Be all you can be is what the Army challenges!  Hopefully, our goal is to improve daily. Be willing to put yourself into learning situations. Take on a new project or role whenever you have the chance. Don't remain the same there is no glory in that. Be willing to listen and ask questions, take yourself out of your comfort zone and change! When we choose to be a student of life, we open up ourselves to a world of possibilities that we never knew existed.

Lately, I have been wanting to improve on my reactions to frustrations throughout the day. I tend to become overwhelmed when things don't always go as smoothly as anticipated.  Being a mother of four and having a military lifestyle tends to set me up for  the attitude "anything goes."  Needless to say, I am not always willing to go!  I fight it tooth and nail becoming less then my best. I have my control fits and trust me they are no so pretty. However, I recognize this and am willing to work on it. Recognizing our need for improvement is half the battle. Being willing to make  a plan and following through is what is important.

You must be willing to make a plan. For me, I know my area of weakness so now I must plan the best route to improve. You can do this by seeking knowledge. I like to use the Word of God to help me. I have learned that the simple truth it contains our powerful and when applied, I can move mountains in my life. However, there are other options out there, like attending conferences or reading self help books or taking classes, etc. Action is required for change! King Solomon of Israel said, "Let instruction and knowledge mean more to you than precious jewels or gold."

I have thought about that truth through the years and desire nothing but the power to change my life by getting wisdom. When I seek wisdom and apply it , it becomes a powerful tool to success.  More so,  I must be willing to live by example but it starts with looking inward to do this. So, often we want others to change  so it makes our lives easier. However,  we don't have the power to change them, only ourselves. When we change ourselves, we then see the world differently and react to others better. Shouldn't this be our goal?

What  do you need to change in your life to become better in your relationships, marriage, finances, job, etc,.? What specifically are you doing today to better yourself?

My Forever Sunset....My proposal story!

I happen to be visiting Maverick, aka, Craig Blow, in the Bahamas for a few days back in 2002 while he was serving as the Army’s Liaison Officer for the OPBAT Counter Drug Mission in Nassau. He would go to work in the morning while I hung on the beach until he retuned from work every day. It was my kind of vacation, sun by day, romanced by night! On this particular morning, I woke up to a note in the kitchen saying, “Be ready out front at 4p.m.- Wear tennis shoes and comfortable clothes-Can’t wait to see you this afternoon!- love, Craig.”  Well, I hate surprises and not being in control of things so my mind was everywhere, but I submitted to the process! How bad could it be after all, I was in the middle of paradise!  I obeyed what the note suggested and  waited  outside the condo complex  with tennis shoes on and an anxious mind to follow. Exactly at 4 p.m. , a taxi cab drove up with Craig in it to pick me up. Off we went to God knows where!

The first question out my mouth was, ‘Where are we going?”  He answered with his tan self,  “You’ll see!”  So, I sat back and we made our way through the busy streets of Nassau until we ended up at a Horse ranch near the beach.  I was excited! I loved horseback riding! ‘Really, we going horseback riding?” I asked. “Yes!’ he said with a beaming smile. I was a happy girl! As we made our way into the ranch, we were greeted by this couple who appeared to be more than accommodating to helping us. We saddled up the horses and I mounted a beautiful tan stallion. “Are we the only ones?” I asked the guide as I looked around to notice we were the only ones there.  He replied, “Must be your lucky day because no one else is riding this afternoon.” I didn’t think anything about it because I could not wait to see the sunset on the beach, so we made our way along the beautiful shore line. We stopped the horses and just took in the view before us. The waves were gently pounding the shore and the water was a crystal blue color. The sunset was absolutely stunning.   It was like looking into a scene on a post card! It was so peaceful to be sitting there atop a horse just enjoying the moment. Life was good, but little did I know, life was going to get better quickly!

All of a sudden Craig decided to dismount his horse and walked over to the side of mine.   I was still sitting on the horse and he began these beautiful words to me, “ Kim, I brought you here today, not to just enjoy this beautiful sunset but to ask you an important question too.” My heart started beating very fast and I just knew where this was going. He reached to grab the back pack on his shoulders and opened up the bag. He unwrapped a bag  and revealed a beautiful handmade woven bag. He reached inside the bag and  as he began to pull out this ring box, all these  beautiful red and pink rose petals fell  to the ground. This guy was good! He could have written a book on the perfect proposal!  He opened up the ring box and an amazing diamond ring in the shape of a Marquis  glared back at me with some bling! I was speechless!  Craig continued to declare his love for me, but honestly, I can’t remember what he said because I was still in shock over the ring. Forgive me Craig!  Hello, you show a girl some bling and all words become white noise!-lol! 

At any rate, I do remember him telling me that he loved me and wanted to spend the rest of his life with me! The whole time, unannounced to me, we were being videotaped. Our guide was in on the proposal plans!  I had been duped, but in a good way! The reason why there was no one at the ranch except us was because Craig rented out the whole place exclusively for us! Can you believe it? I mean who does that? My hubby did!!!

At any rate, the evening didn’t stop there, it got better and better.  As if that was possible, right? We make our way back from the shore line on the horses to the ranch. I was on cloud nine! Between the proposal, the ring, the horse, and the scenery, I was out of my element!   I felt like a princess in a movie. Once we got back to the ranch, another surprise awaited me, a white stretched limousine was parked outside. There was a driver standing there with a bouquet of gorgeous roses to give to me from Craig! I could not believe that Craig had done all of this just for me! Once inside the limo,  there was a bottle of Champaign for us to celebrate with.   We then drove to a local restaurant that was located on a gorgeous part of the island where we ate a delectable Lobster and steak dinner! Needless to say, I had the best night of my life! Less than 3 months later, we were married in the Bahamas.

Are you a Smurf or an Ark Runner?

Does anyone remember the little blue cartoon characters called the Smurfs? Well, the other day I was enjoying watching them on television with my two toddlers. One of the Smurfs was growing impatient as Papa Smurf was leading them on this long journey. The irritated Smurf piped up and asked Papa Smurf, “Are we there yet?” I chuckled to myself as I heard this question because it reminded me of myself as a youngster. Patience was never my strong suit growing up and I still struggle with it today! Papa Smurf graciously replied, “Be patient, in a little while!”.

So many times throughout my life I wanted to complete projects or assignments at school as quickly as I could because I didn’t have the patience or self discipline to work at them properly.  By doing this, I ended up taking short cuts that would cost me in the long run. I would make careless mistakes or worse than that I would end up having to start all over again because I didn’t learn the lesson properly the first time.   I can still hear my dad saying to me, “Work smarter not harder!”  I wasted so much time because of my pride thinking I could cheat the system, when in reality, I was cheating myself.  For some reason my goal was to just finish as quickly as I could and that meant success. Much later in life, I learned that success was not always about finishing but more so in persevering and learning through the process of completing something. Wow, that was a huge lesson for me and still is today!

As humans, we want to take those short cuts. We tend to think shortcuts are going to get us to our end result faster and easier but ultimately it only delays us that much more. A friend of mine and I were joking about how we both tend to be “Ark Runners” ,meaning that we’re similar to the  old servants of God who would  run ahead of the Ark of the Lord in the Old testament and get killed for it! Sure, we laugh about it but it holds some truth!  Running faster or taking short cuts is not always the best way to compete, just look at the  Aesop’s Fable, “The Tortoise and the Hare.” Bottom line in this story-  be the Tortoise!   However, God does not physically kill us but He definitely kills or rather  humbles that pride in us  that allows us to think  we can just take short cuts or run ahead of the process of life.  Timing is everything to God!  He has nothing but time in His hands because He is the author of  it! Hello? Too bad some of us don’t take into consideration that God’s daily planner is not bound to earthly time but rather eternal time.

 Cutting corners is a lack of impatience and self – discipline.  Albert Gray once said, “The common denominator of success lies in forming the habit of doing things that failures don’t like to do.” Let’s think about that for a moment. Can you think of some things that you didn’t want to have to work at because you didn’t have the patience or self-discipline to persevere through them? What were the consequences to that?  It might be a failed relationship, finances, school work or a job. Whatever it was, did it cause an obstacle for you?

Self discipline is a quality that is acquired through practice.  In order to be successful you have to be willing to do what does not come natural. You must be also willing to be held accountable to standards.  Real success is in the experience and process of getting to the end result no matter how you feel.  So many times, we are focused on the end that we miss out on all the wisdom we can gain by facing our fears and challenges through it.  God is met in the middle of the process! Suffering consequences for not following through is a great reminder to help you stay on track, so don’t fight the failures, embrace them!

We can’t be impatient Smurfs and we definitely can’t be “Ark Runners!”. Ask yourself today, have I cut corners or ran ahead in something that I should have taken the time to work through with patience and perseverance? If so, it is not too late to just sit back and enjoy the scenery and take in all the bumps in the road. Each bump has its purpose.  Eventually, you will get there and until you do, remember what Papa Smurf would say, “Be patient, just a little while longer!”

Need Another Belt Hole This Thanksgiving?

Can you believe that next week is Thanksgiving? It seems like just yesterday we  left the sweltering heat of the Mojave Desert to the rolling hills of Kansas! At any rate, like most of America we will be traveling to see family and share in a bountiful meal. I don't know about you, but I am all about the food! Unfortunately, I am one of those people who live to eat not eat to live! How I wish I was the skinny gal who could look at food and not be moved by it.

However this year, I don't want to put on the extra pounds because I just spent some time taking them off. I have always struggled with my weight to a point. More so, after I had my last two children back to back!  When I was in the military, I had to always get taped because I was always about 5 pounds off , but I would always make the tape test.  I tend to be a muscular build and muscle weighs more than fat, at least that is what I would tell myself!-lol Glad those days are over with. I remember starving myself for days because I didn't want the embarrassment of having to be taped. Through the years, I have come to accept that I will never be a size 6 ever again( I think that happened for about 2 seconds somewhere in my life!) but my focus is more about making healthy choices and keeping my body moving at least 30 minutes a day.

This Thanksgiving, I want to enjoy my time with family but at the same time maintain my health. Believe me people, I can go OVERBOARD!!-lol.....I have a small plan of action which is the half the battle....just being aware of what you eat can make a huge difference. For me portion sizes have always been my down fall. I grew up eating 2nd's and third helpings and desert every night. I can't blame my mother, she was a good cook and she was Englishman!  The Europeans love their deserts, not to mention the McMahon clan!

I will be watching portion sizes and scaling back.  Before, I would I never even consider them, but these days I try to eat on a smaller plates and keep the serving bowls off the table to avoid the temptation of more. Also, I plan on allowing myself to indulge in desert. However, again keeping things within limits. I believe in cheating once a week. The biggest thing is to try and keep my body moving for at least 30 minutes a day while traveling will be the challenge,  so I will throw in some walking shoes and make it happen! Craig tries to book hotels that have a gym or indoor pool, so no excuses! Again, have a plan and stick to it!! Go prepared and hold yourself accountable.  And even if you don't have the luxury of those things, you can still exercise without equipment, you just have to be creative. There are tons of ideas on the internet.

There are a ton more tips I could share, but I would love to hear any you might have as we approach the new year about weight loss or even about healthier cooking. It is funny how as I get older and am about to be 40 , I am more aware of my body more than ever, especially what I feed my children. I use to buy sweets all the time, but now I try to limit the deserts to once a week and even try to portion them out. Of course, my 10 year old son whines the whole time and I get faces made at me that would stop any mom in her tracks, but I try to remember that I am his example and more so I am his mother! It is up to me to pass to him good habits....Whatever habits he learns , they will be with him for a lifetime!

I would love to hear any advice, tips or suggestions to how to lead a healthier  Holiday  season this year!
I hope you all have a great Thanksgiving full of joy and great memories. Be safe and enjoy your life!:)

Below is an article I read from Cooper Wellness:

1. First of all, don't arrive at a Thanksgiving dinner hungry. Eat a good breakfast and maybe even lunch that day.
2. Fill half your plate with vegetables, one quarter of it with lean meat, and one quarter with starches like mashed potatoes and turkey dressing.
3. Choose white-meat turkey and avoid eating the skin.  
4. Void gravy. Turkey doesn't need to be smothered in gravy to taste good. If you want gravy, just drip a little on your meat and potatoes.
5. Limit yourself to small helpings of heavily sweetened yams and cranberry sauces.
6. Use restraint when dinner rolls are passed around. Buttered rolls may melt in your mouth, but they're full of calories, so only eat one.
7. Try sampling in moderation the many foods that you have looked forward to. And consider bringing something healthy to the dinner, like a side dish that's low in fat, sugar and salt.
8. Eat slowly. By eating Thanksgiving dinner slowly, your body has time to register when it is full so that you don't consume too much. Don't load your fork with the next bite while still chewing the current one. And instead of hurrying for a second helping, consider taking a short break. Stand up and burn off a few calories by lending a hand in the kitchen. Your hosts will, of course, appreciate the help!
9. At dessert time, try to choose the lightest options. Pick pumpkin over pecan pie, for example, and avoid 200 calories in the process. Or just eat half a piece of pie, and pass on whipped toppings and ice cream. As dinner winds down over coffee, avoid any plates of additional sweets that may be sitting on the table.
10. After Thanksgiving dinner, take a walk with your friends or family. Fifteen minutes of walking will get your blood circulating and can burn off 100 calories, says Susie Kania, exercise physiologist at Cooper Wellness. The fresh air will invigorate you after a long stay at the table.